The Opposite of Hot!

19 Feb

Let me preface by saying that I always feel creepy when I post anything that smacks of a personal attack on someone for something they can not control like their looks.

That said, I must report that last night I discovered what the opposite of hot is while watching a re-run of 80’s sitcom Family Ties.  In the episode, the plot revolved around mom Elyse Keaton re-starting her folk singing career.

And there it was…. The opposite of hot is Meredith Baxter-Birney playing AND singing folk music.  As repulsed as I was, I could not turn away.  Maybe it was like slowing down to check out a highway accident as you drive by, but I couldn’t change the channel as Baxter-Birney sang snippets of five or more folk songs each one worse than the one before. 


Maybe I’m just a masochist.  Anyway, a couple of post scripts.

First, I think I was moved to write this post because the episode combined two things that I’ve never understood the appeal of:  Meredith Baxter-Birney and folk music.  Neither have ever done it for me and combining the two made it hypnotically bad and as a result, almost addictive.  It was like the evil twin of peanut butter cups, which of course combine two great things.

Second, while I’ll never apologize for my negativity toward folk music, it must be noted that my feelings on Ms. Baxter-Birney are just that, my personal reaction to her. 

Clearly, had we ever been single in Hollywood at the same time, Baxter-Birney would have thought herself out of my league.  And perhaps she would have been right.  Ms. Baxter-Birney has had an accomplished acting career and at least some of that is due to people generally finding her appealing and perhaps even attractive.  Again, I can’t really say as she just doesn’t do it for me.

I think the root of my problem with Baxter-Birney may go to my high school geometry teacher.  Let’s call her Ms. Geometry.  Ms. Geometry looked like Baxter-Birney and came off a bit like the ex-hippie that Baxter-Birney played in Family Ties. 

Ms. Geometry came into my life just as I was in the midst of full blown puberty.  She was attractive, but completely humorless and seemingly devoid of any personality.  The combination was mighty confusing to this teenage boy.  At a time when my hormones made almost any breathing human female not related to me seem HOTT, Ms. Geometry’s lack of personality actually turned me off.  During this time, she was probably the first attractive woman I knew to be able to accomplish that feat.

So there it it.  That’s the reason I don’t find Meredith Baxer-Birney attractive.  She reminds me of my high school geometry teacher.

And they say teachers don’t have an impact…

2 Responses to “The Opposite of Hot!”

  1. Davis February 19, 2009 at 3:31 pm #

    You’re right — that is a VERY strange combination. I’ll have to watch for that one. Thanks.

  2. tidewaterjackson February 20, 2009 at 12:20 am #

    If you like strange combinations of awful things this one is the one for you, no doubt.

    Thanks for checking out the post and for taking time to comment.

    Please come on back soon.

    All the best,

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